Saturday, April 27, 2013

Advice -- And The People Who Give It

   In my own experience, there are two types of people who hand out advice. There are the people who give advice in response to a problem that you are facing, and don't mind if you happen not to take that advice. They are just telling you what worked for them, and it's no skin off their back if you don't take it. This is the good kind of advice givers, and the kind that I don't mind. The kind that I do mind are the ones who act like you have insulted their whole family line if you don't take the advice they give. You don't want to starve your picky eater as per their advice and would rather she eat a sandwich if she doesn't like dinner that day, and it's like you have dug up their great-great-great grandfather's grave and fornicated with the corpse. Think that's over the top??? I don't. Some of the moms that I have come across have had that attitude. Don't follow their advice, they will act like you've started WWIII, and will do their best to ruin your world. And even worse than this response to asked for advice is unsolicited advice.
   Talk about being a single mom, and you get some chick in your face talking about how your kid is going to be scarred for life because of the lack of testosterone in the home. Talk about working and needing more hours and someone tells you that they think moms working takes away from the family. Well, excuse me for not fitting the mold of the nuclear family, but never in my life have I asked for advice about whether I should get married, or whether I need to work or not. These are things that I don't need advice about. I'm not gonna hook up with the first guy I meet because you think that I need a dick in my house. And if I don't work? Well, excuse me for wanting to put a roof over my child's head, for wanting to put food in her stomach, clothes on her back, supplies for her school, shoes for her feet, insurance for her medical needs, and all the various things needed to raise a child, which makes up a rather extensive and expensive list.
   But there are some people who don't see the world that way. They have 'advice' for what your family should be, for what you should and should not do with your time, for what you should expose your kids to, for what church you should go to, for how you should dress and allow your kids to dress, and for every little item that makes you the unique person that you are, and God-forbid that you don't take that 'advice'. However, I have some news for you people, this isn't advice, this is your opinion. And regardless of your opinion, I am going to continue to live my life in the manner that I think best. This means that I am going to continue to work my little cashier job, because it pays the best and has the best insurance, and my managers work with me on the hours that I am available to work. This means that I am probably never going to get married. This means that I am going to continue to wear jeans to the ballet, and that I am going to continue to convince my daughter that Justin Bieber is the devil and that her eardrums will melt if she listens to him for longer then it takes to turn the station channel. This means that when the next Elder Scrolls game comes out, I will be buying my girl a copy. And although I will probably never succeed, I will continue trying to convince my daughter that butterflies are not better than zombies. I will decide what my daughter reads, and besides Fifty Shades of Grey, there isn't much on my banned book list. I will decided what is best for us, because I am the head of my family, not you.
   I know that there are many people out there who shake their heads at me, but while they are shaking their heads and proclaiming to the world how wrong I am, I am busy living my life, in my way, on my terms. And although I started writing this blog post feeling mighty bad and feeling pretty hurt, I don't anymore. I have a great life, a life that I've worked hard for, and continue to work hard for. I have every right to be proud of what I have accomplished. And if you don't like seeing me, in jeans, without makeup, and with messy hair, and you don't like my Skyrim-playing, Bieber-hating daughter, pass us on by. We don't like your lifestyle any more that you like ours, but we respect your right to live the way you want; return the favor. In other words: shove your advice where the sun doesn't shine, sweethearts. We're all good here. 

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